Community› Wedding Boards› Etiquette
Etiquette
New Discussion
Options

Save the Date Lost in the Mail

MissKristenWed84403MissKristenWed84403
in Etiquette
We just found out yesterday that FI's Godmother was very offended to not receive a Save the Date and didn't think she was invited to our wedding. Her and her husband are absolutely invited and I know we sent a STD to them. We didn't have any returned to our house so I can only assume it was lost in the mail. We feel awful that she thought she wasn't invited so my FI called her to clear it up (they played a little phone tag yesterday though so hopefully he'll finally talk to her this evening).

My question is, I have extra STD magnets left over so should I send her another one? The envelope and stamp would be different because I sent the rest in fancier envelopes than the ones the magnets came with and I don't have anymore of those or our photostamps. There's a good chance she saw the ones her family members received so she might realize that it's different.
Wedding Countdown Ticker
Report Reply to Post

Re: Save the Date Lost in the Mail

  • jessicadalljessicadall
    As long as you talk to her, I don't think it's that big a deal. One of FI's aunts didn't get an invite for what I can imagine is only the same reason. We called to ask her RSVP when she didn't send the card back, and luckily everything got cleared up! Lost mail happens, especially when you send out large batches it seems.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride
    If she is upset over not getting one, I would get in touch and explain you DID mail it, it must've gotten lost in the mail and apologize. Then I would probably send an extra. It seems like it matters to her whether or not she gets one, so why not?


    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Vacation
    Report Reply
  • Kate61487Kate61487

    The phone call is definitely the first step.  I'd just have FI ask her if she'd like another.  I doubt she'd judge the change in envelope/stamp since obviously it was being mailed separately. 

    It may yet show up, you never know.  It would also be good to just double check the address you have; maybe there's a typo in the zip code or something.  One of my grandma's friends got a new mail delivery person and after years of only having to put 123 Main St. the new carrier wouldn't deliver anything without 123-A Main St (she was in a split unit with A and B; mailboxes right next to each other with their names on it sort of thing and the old carrier had never cared). Shiz happens

    photo IMAG0364_zpsd01034cc.jpg
    PitaPata Dog tickers

    Married Bio

    Report Reply
  • PeledreamsofrainPeledreamsofrain
    This happened with one of our wedding invitations.  Absolutely call her up and explain it.  Sane people will not begrudge your lack of magical mail controlling powers.

    I would also offer to send her another one and get it sent out asap.
    Anniversary
    Report Reply
  • RWolffRWolff
    Just to add, sometimes the magnets get stuck together through the envelopes when you mail them in bulk. I know you got fancier envelopes, but it's possible someone else got two, or a mailman in California had one in his bag that was supposed to go to Massachusetts, kwim?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    image 158 Invited
    image 20 Are ready to party!
    image 23 Will be missing out!
    image 115 Are MIA!

    Report Reply
  • AndreaJuliaAndreaJulia
    Some of ours didn't arrive or arrived up to a month later. I first found out when my cousin's husband e-mailed me asking if they were invited because he heard everyone else got one and they didn't. Then, the next day, my fiance's parents called him saying his aunt was very upset because she didn't have one. We called everyone we knew didn't receive one, apologized, sent our website immediately, and followed it up with the save the date. We also contacted our VIP's to ensure they received them.

    Our planner had addressed the original ones nicely and used pretty stamps, but any replacements I just handwrote the envelope and used a regular stamp.
    Report Reply
  • MissKristenWed84403MissKristenWed84403
    Thanks for the advice everyone! I'm sending her another Save the Date today. It turns out that we had an old address for her. FSIL gave us all of the addresses for their side of the family and I guess her list must not have been totally up to date. Hopefully there weren't any other errors but I'm going to ask FMIL if she can take a look at the address list before we send invitations out. I just wish we had found out sooner considering Save the Dates went out in January!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards